Flashback
by WannabeGallagher
Summary: Cammie returns from her mission, the point of which she can't remember. But she's not just been gone for a few months like she suspected. Injured, disorientated and confused, she needs to find out what REALLY happened on her mission. Sometimes the truth can be deadly. But sometimes, spies want the truth anyway, even if it kills. *This Story starts from the end of book 4*
1. Chapter 1

**Hello to anyone who may still be following me on here! So I think it's been around FOUR YEARS since I last wrote anything, which is just crazy. My last story I wrote 'Rebellious' got SO many incredible reviews from you guys, so I just want to say thank you, even though I wrote it around 4 years ago now I still sometimes get random reviews from people still reading it and it's just amazing!**

 **Anyway, I still love the Gallagher Girls and I just had the urge to write another fanfiction. So this idea came to me.**

 **I hope you enjoy!**

 ***DISCLAIMER: I do not own GG of course, GG belongs to the fabulous Ally Carter***

As I dragged my filthy bare feet along the cold stone floor of the Gallagher academy. I reached up to my head with shaky fingers to feel the laceration on my temple that streaked blood down my face, wincing as my fingers brushed against the burning mass of pain.

I wanted to cry out with every step I took. Agonising pain tore through my body as I hobbled slowly, but purposefully, through the castle corridors. Instead I hissed out air through my clenched teeth, trying to stop myself from making too much noise.

It was late at night, and I was in the corridors that housed the freshman. It would be their first night here, September 1st, I didn't want to wake anyone on the first night of term, all the students would be exhausted after a busy first day.

I grimaced as I caught sight of my mangled body in the reflection of one of the windows. Fresh blood still seeped from the cut on my head and trickled down my body. My body contorted slightly right at an odd angle, probably something to do with the cracking of what could only be my ribs every time I moved. I blushed, because all I had to hide my modesty was a tank top that had been ripped apart just below the chest, and some leggings that were several sizes too big for me. I was annoyed at myself for being so superficial when, clearly, there were much more important issues than my clothing, or lack of, but I was genuinely embarrassed. I'd gone away on my mission, promising everyone i'd be back safe and well, and I couldn't even keep my clothing in one piece.

I leaned against the cold castle wall and groaned, resting my head against the cooling bricks. I wanted to go to my room, rip off my shredded pieces of clothing, stop the blood that poured from the gashes around various parts of my body, gobble down some food to put all the weight i'd lost back on, and change into something that suggested I hadn't come back from my mission almost dead.

But before I could take another step, I was momentarily stunned by the sounds of a shrill siren along with the deep booming sound of the automated "CODE BLACK. CODE BLACK. CODE BLACK", followed by the sound of shouting and screaming and doors opening and slamming.

I instinctively shrunk back into the window alcove, holding my hands tightly over my ears as if that would do anything to block out the excessively loud siren that pounded through my aching body like some form of torture.

Torture.

 _I want to remain silent, I so badly_ need _to remain silent, but I'm so cold that I can't stop my teeth from chattering, and I know Catherine will count that as me making noise._

 _As if to mock me, my stomach chooses that exact moment to rumble, loudly protesting the fact that it's been 5 days now without food, 2 without water._

 _Upon hearing the sound of my betraying stomach, Catherine whips around from the chair she's sitting in, seated alongside the rest of The Circle members. Some of them look round too, distracted for a moment from their meeting._

 _"_ _I'm sorry about that," Catherine snarls, her eyes narrowing in on me. I'm tied to a chair in the corner, the ropes are so tight around me that I'm struggling to breath. "I'll deal with that rodent later"._

 _Most of The Circle members snicker. A few avoid looking at me, clearly feeling some pity for me, but not enough pity to stand up for me._

 _The meeting continues on. They're talking about what they want to do with me, whether to kill me, show me what happens to spies who won't talk._

 _I should care. But I don't. I'm actually hoping that they_ do _decide to kill me, because I don't want to live another agonising day with these people._

 _I feel myself dozing off a few times, but quickly force myself awake with a jolt, terrified that I might snore and bring unwanted attention to myself again._

 _What must be hours later, the meeting ends, and the members begin to slowly disperse. I think I was in and out of consciousness for most of their meeting, so I still don't have any idea what they plan to do with me. But again, I don't really care anymore._

 _Catherine storms straight over to me as soon as most of the members have left, her eyes staring daggers into me._

 _I don't realise that i'm chewing my lip until I taste blood._

 _"_ _You embarrassed me in front of everyone!" she hissed, grabbing the thin fabric of my tank top, ripping it in the process._

 _I don't reply. It's better to stay quiet._

 _I hiss air through my teeth as Catherine slaps me round the face and pain shoots across my skin._

 _Catherine stares at me for several seconds, clearly hoping I'll make some kind of noise so that she can torture me further, but finally, she takes a step back._

 _I feel my mouth water as she grabs a water bottle from her bag, taking a huge gulp._

 _She seems to notice the longing expression on my face and smirks, taking another gulp, making sure I can see clearly._

 _"_ _Maybe if you behave you'll get some water. Tomorrow, perhaps,"_

 _She watches in satisfaction as tears of anger and longing fill my eyes. I am_ so _thirsty I can't take my eyes off of the water in her hand._

 _I don't let the tears in my eyes spill down my cheeks until Catherine leaves the room. Before I even realise, I'm sobbing, huge sobs that wrack through my aching body._

 _I jump out of my skin, shocked into silence, when I feel the sensation of cold glass against my hand._

 _I look from the glass of water in my hand up to the man who has given it to me. But his head is turned towards the shadows so I can't make out his face._

 _"_ _Quickly," he whispers._

 _I don't need to be told twice. I finish the glass of water off in just a few gulps, washing the last gulp around my dry mouth and throat. And just like that I feel like I've been reborn. I've never tasted something quite as miraculous as that glass of water. I tilt the glass against my mouth again, getting out the last drop._

 _I watch in absolute surprise as the man instantly snatches the glass back out of my hand, and heads out the door, leaving me alone in the cold, dark room again, my quenched thirst the only sign that I didn't just hallucinate the whole thing._

 _"_ _Thank you," I whisper into the darkness._

"Her, this person! This is the intruder I saw!"

I glanced into the face of the freshman Hattie Davidson who pointed at me with a trembling finger. Hattie looked like she'd aged a few years, which was impossible considering i'd only been gone a few months.

I watched as recognition suddenly flashed in her eyes. "Wait. Oh my god. What the- Is that-?"

"Thank you, Hattie, but I think I can handle things from here."

"Wait. But that's-"

"Hattie! I don't want to have to tell you again!" My mother snapped, trembling from head to toe. "Back to bed. NOW."

Me and my mother watched as Hattie sprinted back to her room, but not without several glances back behind her.

My mother waited for the sound of Hattie's door closing before she spun back round to face me, like she was suddenly terrified that I was going to disappear.

"It is… Cammie… isn't it," My mother drunk me in, tears pouring down her face.

I was suddenly speechless.

"You're not back there now, you can talk, talk, idiot…" I thought to myself.

"It's me," I managed to croak.

I watched as my mum prepared to launch herself at me, and I prepared myself to be wrapped up in her arms, but then suddenly, her arms dropped back down to her sides. I watched as her lip began to tremble.

"Cameron. Morgan. Do. You. Have. Any. Idea-"

"How worried you've been?" I finished.

My mom nodded.

I reached out for her hand, but she quickly pulled away from me as if I were dangerous.

I felt myself recoil. I knew they'd be mad at me. I'd been gone the whole summer and the only thing they'd known of my mission to find my dad was a crappy note i'd left behind. I'd messed up, I knew I had, but was I really so awful that she couldn't even touch me?

"Infirmary. Now." She crocked.

My mom walked ahead of me at a brisk pace that I was seriously struggling to match, but I didn't want to make any more of a fuss than me being back was already making.

"So, I know you guys must have missed me, but did you really need to welcome me back with a code black?" I joked, trying to break the steely silence.

My mother said nothing, just carried on walking quickly towards the infirmary.

When we got there, the nurse on duty dropped her papers in horror when she saw me.

"Doctor to the infirmary. Now!" She spoke into her radio.

The nurse ushered me to a bed, immediately grabbing all her tools from around the room.

My mom watched as the nurse did her best to glue and bandage me back together.

"It looks much worse than it is," the nurse assured my mom who was steadying herself on the bed, looking pale and sweaty, as the nurse began to sort the wound on my head out, doing her best to stop the bleeding and glue it up.

"She'll need x-rays at some point of course," the nurse told my mom who stared into space and didn't even seem to be listening, "blood tests too."

The doctor arrived just after the nurse had finally helped me out of my tatty clothes and into some hospital pyjamas. I'd tried to stay out of view from my mom, knowing my skeletal body might scare her even more, but I knew from her gasp as I bent over to pull my trousers up, she'd seen the way my spine now protruded from my back.

I wanted to grab her arm and tell her it may have been a few months, but it was still me, Cammie. I could put all the weight back on, my bones would heal, my scars would fade and my cuts would close up. But she stood so rigidly it scared me because it was a whole world away from how relaxed and cheerful she'd been before i'd left. It even looked like she had her first wrinkle on her forehead.

"Cammie, I'm Dr Clarke, I think we better have a little chat…" The doctor spoke for the first time.

I stayed silent as everyone else left the room. I couldn't even look at my mom. I'd been gone only months, but it felt like a lifetime.

Dr Clarke took hours running through my physicals. A broken rib, sprained ankle and a possible concussion. I was dehydrated, malnourished and sleep deprived too, but there wouldn't be any lasting damage. Hopefully.

"Can I go now?" I asked eventually. I was so tired everything was blurry.

"Cammie, we haven't even begun the most important tests of all," Dr Clarke replied.

I sighed. "And what are they?"

"The psychological testing," Dr Clarke said, pulling out his notebook.

I rolled my eyes. "I'm fine."

Dr Clarke actually snorted with laughter.

"I mean it!" I snapped, feeling the anger building inside me. I was tired and thirsty and hungry and cold. I wanted to devour the leftovers of the first day of term feast and then curl up in my favourite blanket and go to sleep. "Please. I'll do this another day, I want to go to bed."

"Fine," Dr Clarke replied to my relief. "I'll compromise with you. I just want you to answer three questions."

I rolled my eyes. "Fine."

"What's your full name?"

"The Queen of Sheeba," I replied sarcastically.

Dr Clarke didn't even smile.

I sighed. "Cameron Ann Morgan"

"And do you know where you are now?"

"The Gallagher Academy"

"And what's the date?"

I swung my legs off the bed, preparing myself to sprint out the room and never looking back after I aced these dumb questions. "1st September," I replied.

Dr Clarke Looked at me for a second too long. Then lowered his glasses. I felt my heart skip a beat.

"What year," he asked.

I'd had enough now. I didn't have any energy left inside me. I began to edge towards the door.

"2014, obviously" I sighed.

With one quick movement Dr Clarke had blocked the doorway.

"Miss Morgan, I suggest you sit back down."

"What the hell?!" I shouted, startling even myself, but Dr Clarke didn't even blink. "You said three questions. You said-"

"Miss Morgan, I'm sorry, but I think you are more confused than you think. September 1st 2014 has been and gone. Today it is 1st March 2015."

I felt my entire body go cold. I hadn't been gone for just a few summer months. I'd been gone for over a year.


	2. Chapter 2

Dr Clarke finished her assessment in the early hours of the morning. By this point, I was running on empty. My words were slurred and jumbled, and I think Dr Clarke was finally starting to take pity on me. Even though I didn't deserve it.

"We will need to carry out more assessments in the coming days Cameron, but for now I'll take you back to the infirmary and-"

"No!" I blurted in horror. I didn't want to be bed bathed and checked on every five minutes for the foreseeable future, I wanted to go back to normality, as impossible as that was probably going to be.

"You need some intensive care Cameron, at least for a few days-"

"I just, I don't feel safe in there," I stuttered, feeling awful for playing Dr Clarke, but still not entirely bothered considering her brutal assessments. "I want to be with my family and friends, surely you can understand that?"

I watched her as she considered, and then just as I thought she was going to say no, she said "and who do you think is going to look after you right now? Everyone is asleep-"

"I will."

I turned on my heel as soon as I heard his smooth voice from the doorway, hardly feeling the startling pain in my injured ankle. He wasn't looking at me, instead staring down Dr Clarke who raised an eyebrow.

Zach had gained more muscle definition, clear from the fact he stood there in nothing but a pair of sweat pants, no shirt, of course. I wanted to believe that was the only difference in him, but I couldn't lie to myself. Zach looked tired and worn, like he also hadn't slept in days.

"And you know she has injuries that need to be taken take of? She is malnourished and-

"Of course I do," Zach leaned against the doorframe, pointing to himself with the smirk on his face that made my heart lurch. "Spy."

Dr Clarke tightened her lips. "And her mother knows?"

Zach rolled his eyes, "who do you think told me she was here?"

Dr Clarke nodded her approval. "Well if Rachel agrees I see no reason for that not to be okay…"

Dr Clarke and Zach looked at me expectantly. I knew I was meant to move and not just stand there staring, but my body felt several seconds behind my brain.

Just when Dr Clarke looked like she was about to change her mind, I manage to find my feet and edge myself slowly towards Zach, trying my best to not limp on my injured ankle and show him how weak I really was.

Zach took my hand easily as he led me through the corridors. I wondered if he could feel my hand trembling beneath his, if he could feel how sweaty my palms were. If he did, he never mentioned it. I knew he was walking slower than usual, and that mortified me, that he knew how weak I had become.

Zach slowed to a stop in the teachers corridor.

"I, um, you don't have to stay in my room," he seems suddenly embarrassed. "I just thought… i don't know what I thought."

"It's fine," I blurted too quickly, cursing myself as soon as I said it. Could I have been any more needy and pathetic?

Zach opened the door to one of the rooms, and as soon as I looked inside I knew it was his. Memories of second year, spying on the Blackthorne guys, hit me. The room was immaculate. Of course it was.

"Why are you staying here?" I asked, before realising it was a stupid question.

Zach probably thought it was too. "Firstly, i'm not safe from The Circle either. Secondly…" Zach didn't look at me as he stepped inside his room, "we were all trying to work together to find you."

"I guess I beat you to it," I tried to joke, but neither of us laughed.

I stood awkwardly in Zach's room whilst he rummaged in his drawers and grabbed one of his tops for me to sleep in.

Before I ran away me and Zach would sleep next to each other in the P&E barn all the time, but back then we would be laughing and joking about teachers and talking about our plans for the summer.

Now neither of us seemed to know what to say or do, we'd become strangers, and was it any wonder when i'd been missing a year? A lot can happen in a year, for both of us.

I stood there for a while, standing holding the shirt that Zach had given me, knowing I needed to take a shower but not having the energy to actually do it.

Zach was already getting into bed, hardly even looking at me.

"I'm just going to… shower," I said finally, forcing myself into the bathroom without waiting for Zach's answer.

I shut the door behind me as I stepped into the spotlessly clean bathroom. I could see myself in the mirror, looking ridiculously awkward and out of place.

I tried to take off the top that the nurse had given me earlier, but for the life of me I couldn't get the damn thing off. I twisted and turned, biting down hard on my lip to try and hold back the screams of pain as my broken rib throbbed in agony.

It must have been longer than five minutes before I gave up, collapsing against the wall in pain. I looked into the mirror again. Dirty, disgusting and bloody, I didn't even recognise myself. I ran a hand through my hair, but I couldn't get my fingers to brush through the knots and dried mud. I felt tears pool in my eyes.

 _Dirty. Ugly. Embarrassment._

"What the _hell_?!"

I jumped in surprise at the feel of Zach's firm grasp around my wrists. I blinked.

In my clenched fist was a handful of hair. Of my hair, muddy and blood-streaked.

"I didn't… I…"

Zach's panicked eyes softened and he pulled me into a tight hug. I collapsed into him, not able to fight back the tears anymore. My ribs throbbed against his chest, but in that moment I couldn't have cared less, I wanted him to hold me this tight forever.

"Sometimes even spies need help," he said gently, and I had the feeling he was referring to more than just me not being able to shower myself.

Wordlessly Zach helped me out of my clothes and into the shower. He passed me shampoo and shower gel, and I gladly watched as the blood and dirt swirled away in the drain. He held out a towel for me as I climbed out and wrapped it around me.

Taking my hand, he led me back into the bedroom and sat me on his bed. I didn't complain when he helped me into his shirt, or when he brushed through my straggly hair as gently as he could. I didn't roll my eyes at him when he helped me into bed.

Because sometimes, even spies need help.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey again guys, I started writing some more of this story and I couldn't stop ha! Thank you all for the lovely reviews as always! I'm starting to get more into writing this story now so hopefully the next update won't be too far away xo**

 _Just as I feel my head pulling me into the sweet depths of unconsciousness, a sharp slap brings me back to reality._

 _"_ _Sleep is for those who have earned it," Catherine snarls as she kneels down to my level and places her hands on my thighs, digging her sharp nails into my flesh. I flinch, but I don't make a sound. She's done worse to me before._

 _Catherine's red hair is blurry and moving around in my line of vision. I can see a few people behind her, but lack of sleep won't allow me to focus on their features to try and make out who any of them are._

 _Catherine starts to speak again, but it's like she's speaking in slow motion, I can't hear a thing over the music._

 _"_ _Well? Are you going to tell me what it is I need to know?" I hear Catherine ask._

 _I crease my brow._

 _"_ _I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE MUSIC," I shout. I know there isn't really music playing and it's just my sanity starting to waver from lack of sleep, but I have to make her understand. I'm so tired._

 _Rage fills Catherine's face and I know i've angered her._

 _"_ _Argh!" Catherine exclaims, then she shouts in my ear, making sure I can hear. "You're weak and useless. One hour of sleep, that's all you're getting, and then back to business."_

 _My eyelids droop before she's even finished speaking. Just as I'm about to drift off, I jolt awake to the feel of a blanket being tucked around the chair I'm tied to._

 _My eyes are too heavy to see the person properly, but i'm sure the person is a man, the same man that gave me the water before._

 _"_ _Why would he care about me?" I wonder, seconds before I fall into a deep sleep._

"Gallagher Girl"

I woke with a start, wondering if I was hallucinating when I saw Zach sitting at the end of the bed. I blinked. Nope, still there.

"It's breakfast," Zach said with a small smile. "Did you sleep okay? You were muttering things in your sleep all night…"

I felt myself blush. "I slept great," I lied.

"Everyone will already be in the dining hall by now, so I thought we could rush to your room so you can chuck your uniform on, blend into the crowd a bit more."

"Good idea," I lied again. As if a uniform was going to conceal the girl presumed dead for a year.

"I'll wait outside," Zach leaned awkwardly against the wall.

I nodded, taking a deep breath before walking into my dorm, only relaxing when I saw that Macey, Liz and Bex weren't inside. I wanted to prolong seeing them for as many more minutes as I could.

I took a step towards my bed, then froze. Because my bed was gone. I stared in shock at where my bed had been. It was like I was catapulted back in time to before Macey had joined the school, when it was just me, Liz and Bex sharing a room. Back then before the extra bed was needed we'd had our own cosy little corner of beanbags. And that was exactly what I was looking at, a beanbag corner where my bed should have been.

I couldn't help it, I was angry, furious. I had no right to be, but I was. How could they just get rid of my bed, as if I didn't even matter, as if my stuff didn't even matter to them?!

My stuff.

I scanned the room with my eyes, and it didn't take me long to find it all.

A huge pile of bin bags in the corner, yes, bin bags, held all my possessions.

I ripped the bags to shreds in fury as I rummaged through all my crap. That's all my stuff was to them, crap. I flung items of clothing across the room, making as much mess as possible, before I found my school uniform, crumpled up at the bottom of one of the bags.

I held it up against me and looked in the full length mirror. It was creased beyond repair, but mostly it was huge. At least two sizes too big.

I wanted to lay down on the floor and cry, but just as I was debating doing just that, Zach knocked on the door.

"You okay Cammie?"

"Yes!" I huffed, fighting back tears.

I had to just put up with it. I pulled on the tights, watching as they bunched up around my knees and ankles, before deciding i'd go with bare legs. It was against the rules, but the Gallagher Academy rules were the least of my problems right now.

I managed to safety pin the skirt so that it actually stayed up around my waist. The shirt drowned me, but maybe that was a good thing, it hid some of my jutting bones.

I pulled my hair up into a ponytail, wincing as my hair tugged at the cut on my head. There was nothing that could be done about my face. Pale and blotchy skin, tired eyes, sunken cheeks. I looked like a dead girl walking.

I could feel the panic churning inside my empty stomach as we approached the main hall. Heat crept up my neck and I could feel sweat gather on my forehead. Zach had hold of my hand, thank god, as I felt like I was about to pass out.

The happy chatter of hundreds of students greeted us as Zach gave me a firm shove inside the main hall doors.

Before I could take another step, I head a loud gasp. "That's her! The missing girl!"

Instantly the hall descended into a hushed silence.

Before I could quite literally have passed out cold on the floor, I noticed Mr Solomon, seated next to my mom who had her head buried in her hands, stand up from the teachers table. "Unless you all have finished breakfast and want to join me for an extra CoveOps lesson this morning, then I suggest you all pick your jaws up off the table and carry on with your breakfast!"

Instantly gazes started to fall off me and concentrate back on their food. Mr Solomon gave me a small nod, but I pretended not to see him. I didn't want my teacher to fight my battles for me.

"This way," Zach said, as if he thought I'd forgotten where our table was.

I saw Bex, Macey and the back of Liz's blonde, newly cut hair, instantly. As we approached our table, I had a sudden, intense urge to fling myself at all of them, hold them, and never let them go. I was in fact about to do just that, when the look on Bex's face stopped me.

I felt like a knife had been stabbed into my heart as soon as her eyes met mine. The anger and betrayal was evident from the horrific glare she was giving me. Then her eyes flickered to Zach, and her expression changed completely.

"Hey Zach," she smiled.

Zach shifted uncomfortably. "Hey, Bex."

I turned to Macey instead, but as soon as my eyes met hers, she directed her attention to Anna who was sat beside her, beginning to chat to her as if she'd never even seen me before.

My heart felt heavy like led. I wondered if I was about to have a heart attack.

"Liz," I croaked hopefully, tears welling in my eyes. Liz would never turn her back on me.

Liz's fork froze halfway to her mouth for a second. I know she'd heard me. But then she continued to eat as if I hadn't spoken.

"We saved you a seat, Zach," Bex said.

Zach looked at me. "Cammie can easily fit on the bench as well, if Macey moves up…"

Macey glared at him. "I'm not about to squash myself up against Anna and Bex like a sardine, Zach."

"Look, it's fine," I whispered to Zach confidently, trying to hide the shake in my voice, "I'll sit at Tina's table."

"But…"

I rushed over to Tina's table before Zach could argue. This was my issue not his. Everyone kept thinking they needed to stand up for me but I wasn't four years old.

As I sat beside Tina, her eyes practically jumped out of her head.

"Cammie!" She exclaimed far too loudly. "You're back!"

"Tina, please, not so loud," I hissed, even though nearly everyone was already casting me sneaky glances. Even Liz, Bex and Macey couldn't help cutting me the odd glance, or rather, glare.

I piled my plate high with food, more than any person could ever eat, especially considering how sick I now felt. But I couldn't be expected to answer as many of Tina's interrogative questions if I had a mouth full of food.

My silence didn't stop Tina talking as much as she possibly could.

"So there was the theory about you being kidnapped by the FBI for some 'unfinished business'," Tina explained excitedly. "Personally I didn't believe it. I think you were more likely to be kidnapped by MI5 because you know some spies who work for them, right Cammie?"

I chewed my way through my food, half listening to Tina, half glancing around and feeling everyone's stares scolding my skin. Just as I went to stab my fork into another sausage, I stared at my plate in surprise. Had I really eaten all of that? The skirt, much tighter now around my stomach, told me I had.

"And then some people thought you had a new secret lover, personally I wouldn't understand if that were the case, Zach is drop dead gorgeous, but maybe you found someone better, maybe-"

"Would you just SHUT the _hell_ up Tina?" I stood up and the words exploded out my mouth without any thoughts even forming in my head. Everyone turned to stare in shock.

Tina's lower lip wobbled. I'd gone too far. But how had I gone too far when I hadn't spoken? But I had spoken… but that wasn't really me!

I stood there knowing I should say something. Knowing I should apologise.

I turned to look at Bex, Liz and Macey, but they quickly looked away.

I was going to be sick. The food churned in my stomach.

I ran. I ran past the tables and the stares and back through the doors.

"Gallagher girl, wait!"

Zach grabbed at my arm, but I snatched it away.

"It's fine, we can sort this out-"

"you don't get it, do you?!" I shouted, glaring at a couple of freshman in the corridor who quickly turned and ran the other way. "This _can't_ be sorted out. This is all wrong. _I'm_ all wrong!"

I left Zach standing there and ran the rest of the distance to my room. My old room, anyway. I opened the door to find a guy stood there in a dirt-stained dungarees.

"Oh hey," he said sheepishly. "I got a request for an extra bed to be brought into this room, where do you want it?"

"Take it back," I snapped. "An extra bed isn't needed in here anymore."

"But, I-"

"Get out!" I yelled, almost automatically. The guy looked at me as if I were crazy, which I probably was, and quickly left.

As soon as he was gone I locked myself in the bathroom, slamming the door shut, before I gaged and began to throw up all the food i'd eaten earlier into the toilet. My nose ran and my eyes streamed as I flushed the toilet and then leaned up against the sink.

My breathing felt too fast and too shallow, like I couldn't get all the air I needed to fill my lungs and keep me alive. I wiped my face with the back of my hand and then looked into the mirror.

Who the hell was I?


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys, sorry i've had so much on I just completely forgot to update. I'll try get as much typed out whilst i'm back in the swing of things though, so I can update more regularly from now on. This chapter is a shorter one than usual, but don't worry, exciting things are coming up!**

 **Whilst you're here please check out my other stories on here, they are all completed so if you're bored of waiting for me to update then please give my other stories a read! :) xox**

The P&E barn was exactly as Zach and I had last left it. Our blankets and bean bags were pushed into the corner like we had always left them.

My heart swelled with the recognition and familiarity of what had been mine and Zach's favorite place.

I went to retrieve one of the bean bags from the corner, ready to settle down here for the night away from everyone that now hated me.

Just as I was moving one of the beanbag's, I noticed a book slip out from underneath. I dropped the beanbag in surprise, kneeling down to retrieve the mystery book that I certainly had never seen before.

I swallowed loudly as I dusted off the front to see the title. It was a journal, titled in Zach's bold handwriting "Gallagher Girl Theories". I took a deep breath as I opened it.

 _Theory 1: Gallagher Girl has been kidnapped by The Circle. Little evidence to suggest this theory._

 _Theory 2: Gallagher Girl has run off with secret lover._ _No evidence to suggest this._

 _Theory 3: Gallagher Girl thinks her dad is alive. Needs further exploration…_

I closed the book forcefully, dropping it back onto the floor. I couldn't read anymore.

"You shouldn't have looked at that".

I didn't even turn around. Zach's voice was already becoming familiar to me again.

"I didn't mean to come back this late," I whispered, only just loud enough for Zach to hear.

"I know."

"I thought it was still 2014."

"I know," I jumped slightly as Zach's arms wrapped around me from behind, but immediately felt myself relax into his arms.

"Do you hate me?" I asked, holding my breath.

Zach immediately spun me around to face him.

"As much as I hate that you ran away Gallagher Girl, I couldn't bear for it to happen again."

"So…" I felt tears forming in my eyes, and I tried to blink them away. "Is that a yes?"

Zach laughed. "I hate what you did Cammie," he wiped away a tear that had spilled down my cheek. "I could never actually hate you."

I fell into his chest with a sob, inhaling the sweet smell of his aftershave, and just his general Zach smell. He held me back tightly.

"Are you tired?" he asked.

I shook my head no. So Zach grabbed the beanbags from the corner, kicking his journal right into the corner of the room into the shadows, and dragged them to the center of the room where we could stare out of the large windows into the dark night together.

"Don't you ever do that to me again Gallagher Girl," Zach sighed as he flopped down into the beanbag.

"I don't plan to," I said definitely, easing myself more gently into my beanbag, wincing at the sharp pain radiating from my ribs.

"I have to ask," Zach turned to face me. "Why did you leave? You didn't even leave a note."

I shrugged, swallowing the lump in my throat. "I honestly don't remember anything Zach, or anything important anyway. I don't know why I left. I don't even remember leaving. I don't even remember how I escaped from The Circle. I just remember…"

Zach's eyes widened slightly. "You remember what?"

"I remember dying." I sucked in a deep breath. "I was dying. Dying of thirst and hunger and I was so, so, weak. But there was a man."

Zach sat up straighter.

"I remember there being a man. I don't remember his face or anything, but he saved me Zach. He snuck me food, and water, and kept me warm. He saved my life."

"Was he a member of The Circle?" Zach asked in confusion. "Why would he help you?'

I sighed. "I don't know. Maybe he was undercover? Maybe he really was a member of The Circle but he felt sorry for me? Maybe…"

"Maybe what?" Zach asked.

"Maybe he was my Dad."

I could see Zach almost laugh, thinking I was joking, before he saw that I was serious.

"Cammie, you know your dad is dead. Your mom has always maintained that he is dead, she wouldn't lie about that."

I threw my head back in frustration, trying to clear the ridiculous idea from my head. "I know. You're right."

Zach squeezed my hand. "Whatever it was, whatever happened, you're out now."

I sucked in a breath. "I guess so."

"Nothing like this has to happen again." Zach smiled.

"Yep," I smiled back, ignoring the unsettling feeling in my stomach.


End file.
